The last time that I saw my mother was 15 years ago

The last time that I saw my mother was 15 years ago and I don’t know where she is now. I have searched all over the country in every state that I think she might have moved too but there is no trace of her anywhere. I am not sure why she left me and my father and joined the circus but it is something that she always used to say when she was mad. “I am going to run away and join the circus” she would say. “I hope you will appreciate me then.” I never know why she thought that joining the circus would make us appreciate anything that she did. What did what I have to do with joining the circus anyway?

We went to the circus once when I was seven and she hated it. I loved all the noise and the smell of the popping corn and the animals and people moving back and forth through the big top. She hated it all and we never went to the circus again so why would she join the circus? The circus was in our town on the day she did not show up to pick me up at school. She never left a note or gave my father any idea that she was going away. She thought that her life was a big mess and that no one ever listened to what she was saying but I listened.

I am not sure where to look next but I have followed the circus all across the country and been to all of the shows in all of the cities and have never seen a sign of her. Could it be that she was in disguise? I searched the acrobats and the trapeze artists, the animal trainers and the circus clowns and there was no sign of her. After I gave up and went back home I kept sending letter to different circuses but still no luck. It has been fifteen years and I have searched every circus in the country. I am wondering did she really join a circus or was she just saying that.